May God bless you as you expect another bundle of joy! I’m sure you’re curious as to what this pregnancy will be like compared to your last. Don’t worry dear friend, I don’t think it matters how many children a woman has, we always wonder what it’s going to be like this time around. I think I may have the most children out of any of the folks I know my age. So, it’s no surprise that sometimes friends and acquaintances ask me what it’s like to be pregnant again. That’s why I thought it would be nice to write a little post on what to expect when you’re expecting, AGAIN!
1. Don’t expect things to be the same as last time. Every baby is different. Every pregnancy is different, and every labor is different. Every single one of my pregnancies had a few similarities but way more differences. I even carried each baby differently! If you approach this baby and pregnancy as a completely new experience, you wont be too caught off guard or disappointed if things turn out differently.
2. Expect the unexpected. This is my motto in pregnancy AND in raising children. Similar to my previous tip, if you expect the unexpected you wont be caught off guard or too wrapped up in expectations. You will also be more rational, level-headed, and proactive.
3. Expect to not buy as much. Now you’re a seasoned MomPro and you know what products ended up being completely useless, and what you could really use more of! Even if you’re having a different gender, you still have a general idea of what basics became indispensable the last time around. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself rolling your eyes at all of the new doodads and gizmos coming out for mommies and babies these days. In fact, once your baby gets here...don't be surprised if you're generally not as particular or helicopter-ish over your new bundle. You just got this now!
4. Expect to not buy all those baby books, videos and pregnancy magazines. Now that you’ve already had a baby, you have a clear idea of what to expect. You don’t really need a book to tell you what you’ve already been through. It’s nice to casually flip through those pregnancy mags while you’re sitting in the doctor’s office, but you’ll find that you wont be grabbing them off the shelves at the grocery store. After my first baby I realized that I didn’t want to watch, see or read much of anything about other people’s pregnancies or labors. Watching other mothers go through a bunch of drama wasn’t the mindset I wanted to have in my head going into my pregnancies. I only want to have the peace of God in my soul when I go into labor….a willingness to go with the flow, and follow his plan for how to best get my baby here safely. It’s really worked for me!
5. Don’t expect everyone to be as excited as you are. After you had your first baby, folks started bugging you about when you were going to have another. Now that you are having another, people are looking at you funny and asking you about your prevention practices. The point is, people are always going to think that they have a right to comment on your family size (THEY DON’T). Read my post on how to best react in these types of situations. Babies are such a blessing, and it truly is an honor to think that God trusts you with one of His own. Don’t let anyone steal your joy over this life event, and feel free to actively avoid or keep at an arm’s length those who don’t speak words of life to you about it.
6. Expect for time to fly by. This pregnancy will probably feel as though it is flying by. You’re too busy taking care of your other child (children) to get too caught up in the nausea, aches and pain. You probably don’t even check the due date calculator like you used to, and will be surprised that all of a sudden your baby is as big as a butternut squash now. It’s all good. It’s okay if you didn’t get a bumpie in for every month. It doesn’t mean you love this baby any less, it just means that this baby is becoming a comfortable new aspect of the life you’re already living.
7. Expect postpartum to be different. Things will be different when you bring this baby home. You may not have the time to fully rest like you did before (so take full advantage of the sleep you can get in the hospital), because you have a child/children at home who still need care. You may hurt more. You may hurt less. It may take you longer to heal. You may snap right back. Listen to your body and new baby. Take all the help you can get (no need to be a Superwoman…we already know you’re Superwoman). Take the pain meds! Take the Dulcolax! Take the nap! This isn’t a dress rehearsal sweetie. Your family needs you, so don’t forget self-care and don’t put any extreme expectations on yourself in the aftermath of it all.
8. Expect to lean on God more. I think that with every child, most mommies tend to worry a little bit more. You’re wondering what your new normal will look like when baby arrives, and whether or not you can handle it. Of course you can! God wouldn’t put more on you then you can handle. WORD TO THE WISE: Your power as a mother is dependent on God. You draw all of your strength as a mother from God. You will find yourself crying out to Him…leaning on Him…praying to Him to help you with these children like never before. This is a good thing! He is a faithful God, and will give you everything you need to survive this lifelong journey of motherhood. He wants to be there for us. He is walking right beside us throughout the day, ready to pick us up if we fall.
Those are my tips on expecting another baby! It’s an exciting time, and so amazing how these little beans make you forget everything that you go through to get them here. Just think about those moments after it’s all said and done….when you’re holding that sweet new little baby…memorizing every little toe and nose wrinkle. It’s truly a gift from God.
"Every good gift, every perfect gift is from above., and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. “
~ James 1:17 KJV